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You Can’t Pour from an Empty Cup: Self-Care for Therapists, Advocates, and Caregivers

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You Can’t Pour from an Empty Cup

Reflecting on my 25 years as a psychotherapist and first responder, I've learned that knowing my limits is crucial to being an effective clinician. Early in my career, I found myself constantly worrying about my clients, even after the workday had ended. It was one of the hardest things to let go of, but I realized I couldn’t pour from an empty cup. As a mother of three young kids, I had to make the difficult decision to set boundaries, ensuring that I could be fully present for my family without sacrificing my ability to care for my clients.

Burnout is a real concern, especially in the work I do. In fact, burnout rates among activists and advocates have reached an all-time high, with 75% of individuals reporting physical or emotional exhaustion (Journal of Social Activism, 2021). For years, I ignored the warning signs, pushing through the exhaustion, thinking I could handle it all. But the truth is, without prioritizing self-care, the impact on my health and my work was inevitable.

Learning to respect my limits allowed me to be a better clinician. I became more aware of how much I could give without compromising my well-being. The balance between serving others and caring for myself has made me more effective, more compassionate, and better able to show up for both my clients and my family. It's a constant reminder that taking care of myself isn't a luxury—it’s a necessity.

Prioritizing self-care is not selfish; sustaining the work we do is essential. I’ve learned that I can only fight for change and support others effectively if I’m also taking the time to care for my own mind, body, and spirit. In the long run, this balance strengthens me and empowers me to be the advocate, therapist, and mother I strive to be.

Here are some of my Self-Care Tips for Advocates:

  1. Set boundaries: Learn to say “no” to protect your energy.
  2. Recharge regularly: Take breaks and engage in activities that restore your spirit.
  3. Seek support: Lean on your community to share the burden.

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