Your Resilience Isn’t Random—It’s Type-Specific

The summer is almost over for those in southern United States, and I am preparing for my son to head back to school for his senior year! Wow! Time flies, love them big! 

I need to tell you something that might change how you see yourself forever. Your Enneagram type didn't just randomly appear one day—it's literally wired into your nervous system based on how you learned to survive or adapt to your environment. And those "flaws" you keep trying to fix? They're actually your brilliance in disguise.

Let me share something personal. As a Type 3 with one-one instinct, I spent years thinking my intense drive to achieve was something I needed to tone down. "You're too much," I told myself. "You're making others uncomfortable." But here's what I discovered through my own healing journey: that intensity wasn't a character defect—it was my nervous system's way of ensuring I stayed valuable, connected, and safe. My achievement orientation developed because my young brain learned that being successful meant being loved. And yes, at a certain point in my life those adaptive strategies stopped serving me well, and I had to rewire these patterns.

The research backs this up beautifully. Dr. Bessel van der Kolk's work shows us that our personality patterns are actually trauma responses that worked so well, they became our default operating system. Your Type 6 vigilance? It's your nervous system's sophisticated early warning system. Your Type 9 peacemaking? It's your brilliant conflict-avoidance strategy that kept relationships intact when you were small.

I've been working with hundreds of therapists and healing-focused individuals, and I see the same pattern everywhere: we're trying to heal FROM our types instead of WITH them. When my Type 8 clients embrace their intensity as protective leadership instead of "anger issues," everything shifts. When my Type 4 clients recognize their emotional depth as exquisite sensitivity rather than "being too much," they stop apologizing for their gifts.

This week, I'm sharing power phrases for each type—not as affirmations you repeat mindlessly, but as invitations to finally see your survival strategies as the intelligent adaptations they've always been. Your resilience isn't random, beautiful human. It's proof of your nervous system's incredible wisdom.